Sometimes, well most of the time, when it comes to self examination, we are quick to look the other way and pretend that we don’t possess any traits of toxic, negative, behavior. I can personally admit that I do not like to be called out on my unpleasent traits. Nobody does, but we need to be honest with ourselves so that we can grow as individuals.
God showed me my heart, and I didn’t like what I saw at all. I didn’t like the person I had become, and this was my first wake up call to address my self-sabotaging behavior and make some adjustments.
For the most part, I am a pretty positive person, but my heart is not always in the right place. When I feel as though I’ve been betrayed, all types of thoughts come to mind, and they are not always godly. I have noticed that I sometimes have a hard time forgiving. I know we are all supposed to forgive, but it gets hard sometimes - especially when the hurt cuts deep.
I’ve made it a point to work on letting things go.
I’m guilty of calling others out on their wrong doing, and God humbled the heck out of me for doing this. I once blasted someome I had an issue with...I mean literally calling them out on their sins, and the next thing I knew, I was committing those same sins, but trying to make excuses for it.
God is comical and has a way of bringing us back down to reality, especially when we are getting out of control and on our high horse. I‘m guilty of looking at people’s situations and saying to myself that I would never be in that position if I could help it, and the next thing I knew, I was in that same position. Actually, I was in a worse position and didn’t even realize it until after the fact.
I didn’t realize it until God humbled me, and it hit me hard. I felt so bad for judging the next person, when I had absolutely NO ROOM to judge anybody. Am I proud of my behavior? No, but I’m glad that I am now aware of the actions and thoughts I was displaying. I’m seriously embarrassed for being that person who had so much pride and so much to say about someone else’s situation, that I didn’t realize that I was no better than anyone else regardless of how different the circumstances were.
I challenge everyone to take a look at their own heart. Examine the things you find humor in, and the things that could negatively affect you growing as a person. If another person’s downfall or another person’s hurt or anguish is comical to you or gives you satisfaction, I would suggest you doing some soul searching and self-evaluation. None of us have room to be happy when bad things happen to other people no matter how much we dislike them.
God can easily place you in their shoes, and give you a front row seat as to why you have no room to laugh. I’m just speaking from experience and hope this helps get someone else’s heart in the right place. Make it a point to grow not only physically, but mentally and spiritually as well.